Watch television any night of the week and you’ll be bombarded by ads for prescription sleep aids. We live in a stressful time. But much of the angst that I observe is, unfortunately, self-imposed.
I meet executives all the time, for example, who want to run the company. But I have to remind them to first start doing a decent job of managing their lifestyles. No board is going to give you responsibility over their organization if you cannot first demonstrate that you know how to maintain a sustainable work/life balance. Where does it start? You have to take the business of mindset management seriously.
I’ll give you an example from one of my coaching sessions with a private client. I was shocked when he told me, “Sarah, I wake up in the middle of the night, worried that I’m not living up to the expectations of my boss.”
So I asked my client, “Did your boss tell you that he was displeased with your work? Did he explain how it is that you are not doing what is expected of you?”
“No. He hasn’t given me any feedback to that affect.”
“Well for all you know he may be happy with your performance,” I pointed out to him.
“Yeah. But I still worry.”
Hey, I totally understand where he’s coming from, because as a young manager I used to worry that I wasn’t going to be able please my demanding boss. But then I realized that all of that energy I was putting into fretting was just wasted brainpower. If you open up the lines of communication that will resolve most of your doubts in the blink of an eye. By dwelling on optimistic possibilities rather than doomsday scenarios you invite more positive opportunity into your life. When you aren’t listening to the negative chatter in your mind – what I call your Evil Twin Within – you can start listening to messages of self-affirmation, confidence, and empowerment.
The bottom line? If you aren’t sure, ask for feedback from your boss. Don’t sit in the dark driving yourself into a tizzy. But don’t just talk to your boss. Talk to yourself, up there in the movie theater of your head. You’re deserving. Tell yourself that you’ve done the hard work to get where you are. Everything you need to succeed is within you. Step away from the fear and it will disappear. Own your power. Start living your dreams during the day. Believe me, you’ll sleep a whole lot better at night.
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Sarah Hathorn is a leadership development mentor, executive presence coach, image and branding consultant, public speaker & author. She is the founding CEO of her own successful company, Illustra Consulting, and the creator of the proprietary Predictable Promotion™ System.
1-800-267-3245 | www.illustraconsulting.com
Copyright © 2013, Sarah Hathorn, AICI CIP, CPBS